Women Reproductive HealthJanuary 8, 2019
Memoir of BushraJanuary 9, 2019
My parents gave me dowry of less value because they wanted you to know that either you love their daughter or worldly processions. These sentences were said by a newly-wed bride when her in-laws and her husband himself commented on the dowry items. The wisdom of this girl was in fact the reflection of her 5 elder sisters’ weddings & gossip upon their weddings.
The parents of the girl chose the proposals of those boys who were honest & hardworking for their daughters. Now when restlessness & calmlessness are on its peak in this society we need to search for its reasons & solutions of these problems.
At this time, the uncontrolled freedom of the media in our society encompasses the heart & mind of the people. The glamour shown over dramas & films plays a great part in this. This glamour & worldly possessions have made us blind, so that we forgot that:
“Verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.” -Al Quran
Our lord, our creator is telling us,
“O ye who believe! Obey Allah & the messenger(PBUH) when He calls you to that which gives you life, & know that Allah comes in between the man & his own heart & that He it is unto whom you will be gathered.” Surah Al-Anfal verse 24
Now we have to seek guidance from the Quran and Hadith against oppression, injustice and restlessness in the name of custom and tradition under the influence of media in our society. We can study in Islamic history that there was no such thing as dowry at weddings in Islamic societies. The domestic things given to Fatima (RA) was due to the fact that Ali (RA) was dependent upon Hazrat Mohammad (Peace Be upon Him). For this reason, basic items of household needs were given to her; not to show off.
This new tradition of dowry has disturbed the middle & lower-middle class. Now parents of girls are worried about their daughter’s dowry from her birth
Blessed are those houses in which the Quran & Hadith are being acted upon. They are worried about partaking in such a social ritual that is the cause of oppression & restlessness of humanity.
The need of the hour is that negation of dowry from both (the bride & bridegroom’s) side must be done & on this no harsh words should be spoken to the bride.
Written in urdu by Bushra Kanwal
Translated by Rani Sumayya